If you don\u2019t love yourself, you cannot love others. \u00a0~~ His Holiness the 14th Dalai Lama<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Do you remember a time when you could eat almost anything, and not worry about how many carbs you were consuming, or if that Coke you guzzled with lunch was making you crash after your sugar rush? Ahhhh\u2026yeessss. \u00a0The good ol\u2019 days, as they say.\u00a0 I use \u201cthey\u201d because that was never me. I have always worried about something. Worried about what I was eating. \u00a0Worried about getting good grades.\u00a0 Worried about needing to buy a larger size. Worried about what people saw when they looked at me.\u00a0 Worried, worried and worried.<\/p>\n

$\"Can$

Can you believe they still use \u201chusky\u201d?<\/p><\/div>\n

If you\u2019re reading this, I\u2019m sure it\u2019s not surprising to have me say I don\u2019t have memories of being thin. I remember shopping at Sears with my mom for new school clothes and always ending up in the boy\u2019s section. Oh, I\u2019m sorry. \u00a0In the \u201chusky\u201d boys section. \u00a0So, by virtue of my wardrobe I was assumed to be a tomboy; attired in my corduroy pants, t-shirts, and my Converse hi-tops or my Wallabees. (Hey!\u00a0 Don\u2019t criticize!\u00a0 They were cool!) \u00a0Truthfully I really was a tomboy. I had evidence.\u00a0 Like the day I stayed late at school to play and had to climb the fence to get off the playground; tearing my back pocket (and most of my right pant leg) on the top of the fence. (I walked home with a sweatshirt tied around my butt.)<\/p>\n

Anyway, as I got older, my height stopped at 5\u2019 3 \u00bd\u201d.\u00a0 Not\u00a0out of the ordinary in my family.\u00a0 However, my girth just kept growing. By the time I started my senior year of high school, I probably weighed in at 180-200 lbs.\u00a0 Can\u2019t really be sure, it was oh so long ago.\u00a0 I was officially the chubby friend.\u00a0 You know her.\u00a0 The one in your group who had tons of friends who were boys, but never really had a boyfriend.\u00a0 The girl who knew all the cheerleaders, but wasn\u2019t one.\u00a0 The girl who knew all the class officers, but lost every election.\u00a0 Yup.\u00a0 That was me.<\/p>\n

I don\u2019t tell you this to garner sympathy or pity.\u00a0 I tell you to give you a peek into my perspective on the age I\u2019m at now\u2026MIDDLE AGE!\u00a0 I feel like I should insert an evil laugh right here.\u00a0 Why evil, you might ask?\u00a0 Well, because I\u2019ve come to see this midlife period as the great generation equalizer, and I relish it.\u00a0 Probably inappropriately so.\u00a0 It is, I\u2019m sure, the same for every generation. But this one\u2019s mine.<\/p>\n

Equalizer.\u00a0 Sounds like a great name for a water gun, doesn\u2019t it?\u00a0 Anyway, I say equalizer because it\u2019s an age where we all start to experience physical and mental changes, and I mean ALL. \u00a0Of course, you\u2019re probably thinking midlife crisis or menopause, or even age discrimination in the workplace. \u00a0I\u2019m more concerned about those things that surprise us\u2026that sneak up on us as we go about our regular daily life.\u00a0 It happens in different ways, of course, and at different speeds.\u00a0 But inevitably, it happens.<\/p>\n

$\"oops$ Your doctor tells you to eat less red meat. She tells you to exercise more. The scale in your bathroom clearly lies and needs to be replaced. The mirror reflects an image very much like father\u2019s or your mother\u2019s. When did THAT happen? \u00a0\u00a0Unless you are in the fitness industry, the average American begins to soften up a bit as they move into the 40s\u2026and then especially when it comes to the big 5-0. \u00a0Folks have pounds they can\u2019t shed, high cholesterol numbers they don\u2019t understand, and physical tests that just\u2026well never mind.\u00a0 You\u2019ll figure it out when you get there. \u00a0You\u2019re a lucky one if your medicine cabinet isn\u2019t lined with little orange bottles.<\/p>\n

You might be one of those who believes if they just keep running every morning, they\u2019ll be fine.\u00a0 You\u2019d be wrong.\u00a0 If you\u2019re still drinking alcohol on a regular basis, running every morning isn\u2019t going to help you much.\u00a0 If you\u2019re still eating at the local drive-thru on your way to work after your morning jog, you should think about jogging again after work.<\/p>\n

I\u2019m telling you, it\u2019s all about the age\u2026the MIDDLE AGE!\u00a0 I can\u2019t help repeating myself.\u00a0 Don\u2019t forget to insert the evil laughter.\u00a0 I actually think I like being at this stage in my life.\u00a0 It\u2019s rather liberating, I find.\u00a0 I no longer care much what other people think.\u00a0 I rarely worry about what other people say when they see me walking around in a tank top and shorts on a summer afternoon.\u00a0 Twenty years ago, I would have never done that.\u00a0 I would have most definitely put on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt.\u00a0 Showing naked limbs was a supreme no-no.\u00a0 Nowadays, I couldn\u2019t care less.<\/p>\n

Some might classify my attitude as apathetic.\u00a0 I don\u2019t see it that way at all.\u00a0 It\u2019s definitely liberating to just be myself, regardless of what others might think or say.\u00a0 I call it letting go of the worry gene.\u00a0 Whether it stems from my Asian background or my general Catholic upbringing, it doesn\u2019t matter. Not anymore.\u00a0 I have realized for me to live a healthy life I must eat better, move more and let go of things I absolutely cannot control.\u00a0 Don\u2019t get me wrong, I care about many things, many people and many relevant issues.\u00a0 The truth, however, is I need what energy I have to facilitate this huge change in my life.\u00a0 My focus, probably for the first time in my life, has to be me.\u00a0 Identifying things that help me most in achieving this lifestyle change is paramount.\u00a0 It\u2019s all about me.<\/p>\n

Do those things include worrying about what people think as they run past me wearing my bandana headband?\u00a0 Nope!\u00a0 What is important is that it keeps the sweat from blinding me as I exercise.\u00a0 Should I be concerned about being amazing at menu planning?\u00a0 Probably not, but I can get competitive sometimes.\u00a0 What I should strive for is just menu planning on a regular basis, which I don\u2019t do now. \u00a0That\u2019s a sound goal.<\/p>\n

So yes.\u00a0 I definitely feel liberated by letting go of all that mental energy being wasted on superfluous things. Let me tell you, it\u2019s an amazing feeling.\u00a0 I often keep to myself these days, and don\u2019t see my family as much as I\u2019d like\u2026and I didn\u2019t realize until a few weeks ago when I was working on a \u201cclass assignment\u201d that they\u2019d even notice a difference.\u00a0 My niece, in response to my assignment, mentioned that I seemed lighter.\u00a0 She didn\u2019t know how to explain it, but I knew exactly what she meant.\u00a0 She wasn\u2019t talking about my body weight.\u00a0 She was talking about the weight on my shoulders. The worry on my mind.\u00a0 The stress of my life.<\/p>\n

During this time when so many of my generation are facing those dreaded years of midlife with new trepidation and worry; when their minds are focused on all those ravages of time they didn\u2019t see coming, I can\u2019t help but snigger a little.\u00a0 Evil, I know.\u00a0 But ultimately, I have to let that go, too.\u00a0 Let it go because it doesn\u2019t help me on my healthy living journey.\u00a0 I can\u2019t face midlife with dread.\u00a0 I have to face it with a smile in the morning, determination and a hope for a better me.\u00a0 \u00a0I have to support those who support me, cheer their successes, and offer opinions or options.\u00a0 I have to be honest without hurting people.\u00a0 Share experience and knowledge without being condescending or righteous.<\/p>\n

So I say liberate yourself!\u00a0 Join me! Figure out what is most important for YOU.\u00a0 Maybe you\u2019re perfectly healthy at 55, and the most important thing is to just keep moving on.\u00a0 But if you\u2019re like me, someone who learned to focus on others or those external things that happen around me or to me, I say Let It Go!\u00a0 Just let it go.\u00a0 Focus on what is truly important.\u00a0 Again, if you\u2019re like me, and you\u2019re on a journey to find your healthy self for the first time (or again), focus on YOU.\u00a0 That\u2019s the most important.<\/p>\n

$\"broken$ So, see your doctor.\u00a0 Let her lecture you, and then take steps to improve your life.\u00a0 Take time to identify those things you eat that mess with your digestion and get rid of them.\u00a0 If you used to be a runner or a bicyclist, dust off your shoes or fix your bike chain and get back out on the road.\u00a0 If you\u2019ve gained 40 lbs. in the last 4 years but have no idea why, then grab a notebook and track everything that goes into your mouth every day for a month.\u00a0 You\u2019ll see a pattern.\u00a0 Then change it.<\/p>\n

Don\u2019t let yourself fall into the trap of a midlife crisis. \u00a0Take control, and discover your midlife wellness. Focus on what is most important.\u00a0 You!
\nUntil next time\u2026<\/p>\n

$\"AB$ <\/p>\n

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